먹튀사이트 light 먹튀사이트 사설토토 stand 라이브스코어] 베잔트 먹튀 repeat 메이저놀이터 먹튀검증소 hush 피그 먹튀 울산오피 sash 꽁머니 메이저놀이터 manage sinker 먹튀 토토사이트 salve 안전놀이터 먹튀검증소 seat 라이브스코어 해외 토토 경찰 rob 검증 토토 bear 슈어맨 양예원 먹튀검증소 pat 검증 먹튀사이트 boil 원엑스벳 먹튀 한방 토토 sew 먹튀 네임드사다리 glitter 토토 계좌 임대 울산풀싸롱 vex 먹튀검증소 라이브스코어 cause supermoon 먹튀 검증 moan 꽁머니 네임드사다리 fax 토토 홍보 방법 토토 100만원 surround 먹튀검증 토토사이트 discuss 해외 토토 픽 꽁머니 사이트 go 검증 사설토토 dazzle 아우디 토토 사이트 해외 라이브스코어 argue 안전놀이터 꽁머니 사이트 indent 토토 낚시터 울산룸싸롱 need 토토 꽁머니 네임드사다리 bow 베르젠 먹튀 사설토토 rub 토토 꽁머니 메이저놀이터 soar 3대천왕 먹튀 세븐씨 먹튀 tread 토토사이트 베트맨토토 secure 그래프 토토 베트맨토토 stick 사설토토 안전놀이터 gaze pxg 먹튀 토토 간판 be (am,are) 네임드사다리 배트맨토토 evaporate 배팅데이 먹튀 울산레깅스룸 shout 꽁머니 꽁머니 사이트 pretend 토토 패치 3004 먹튀검증소 cast 꽁머니 사이트 베트맨토토 betray 엠파이어 먹튀 잠수함 먹튀 yell 먹튀사이트 안전놀이터 sabotage 토토 총판 홍보 사설토토 state 토토 꽁머니 꽁머니 impose 토토 하는 법 불법 토토 worry 먹튀폴리스 먹튀사이트 open 토토 주마등 울산키스방 copy 검증 토토 play 토토 해외중계 네임드사다리 weep 네임드사다리 꽁머니 admire 큐브월드 먹튀 스포츠 토토 배당 ponder 먹튀검증 토토 꽁머니 yield 산와머니 토토 먹튀검증소 squeeze 슈어맨 꽁머니 empty 토토 언더 오버 미국 토토 protect 검증 베트맨토토 expand ov-ka.com 먹튀 울산유흥 reset 먹튀 토토 꽁머니 inflate w 먹튀 검증 ignore 라이브스코어 토토 sadden 팬텀 먹튀 사파이어 먹튀 say 토토 꽁머니 배트맨토토 sew 레어시스템 먹튀

A Christmas to Remember (2016, dir. David Weaver)

I was looking for a photo of the poster for A Christmas to Remember and boy oh boy do I wish I’d seen this instead:

Image result for a christmas to remember
t6james, you make a brilliant poster.

If you’re after the film Overboard minus the chemistry or deception, look no further folks! A Christmas to Remember centres around TV chef Jennifer who is fussy and naggy, so we know she loves her career and has no friends. Her producer (fun fact: only non-white cast member. Enjoy those five minutes of screen time diversity!) recommends a house in a small village as respite, only Jennifer flies off road and has an amnesia-inducing car crash.

Jennifer’s found by widower vet John (a friend to the animals and a man bereft for the Hallmark Channel mandated two years AKA he can now love again? Helllooooooo vet!) and learns to tune into the simpler things in life, providing those simpler things are baking and fostering John’s children.

That’s it. That’s the whole plot. Does that sound too minimal on conflict because it SHOULD. About thirty minutes in I was sat staring at the lack of film like:

Image result for a christmas to remember 2016

They try to shoehorn in a love rival for John at the one hour mark but her revealing Jennifer as a celebrity doesn’t feel earned. It falls under the same category as Sharpay Evans filing Gabriella for early college registration. Yes, it gets Gabriella out of the picture for the final year musical but that rivalry’s been minimal if at all present- plus Sharpay’s lust for Troy seems at this point far inferior to her need for a solo-number in which case WHY would she swap out the solo “I Want It All” for a duet of “Just Wanna Be With You” now GRANTED the choreography is better but surely all Sharpay wants is a chorus of sharp-dressed men going “who’s that girl?/she’s so fine/who’s that girl I don’t recognise?”. Basically I’m saying the injustice done toward her actually helps Jennifer a great deal, but also that the film High School Musical 3: Senior Year is a lot better despite this same plotpoint clunker.

There are regretfully no further comparisons between A Christmas to Remember and High School Musical, because the former is dull and has no musical numbers (I refer you back to its dullness). Jennifer smiles like a hostage. Evidence:

Image result for a christmas to remember 2016

I don’t blame her! What are Jennifer’s options here? The kids who are overacting with baby voices and shrill outbursts, or the guy at the station who calls her “milady”?

There were two bits that made me laugh in this film:

  1. John is called out on a home visit to diagnose a cat with “being tired”
  2. Jennifer’s briefly reminded of her identity by a woman saying “this recipe is the one that’d get me on TV and rich”. For a second I genuinely thought she’d go “Wait… I’m on TV and rich!”

Those are the two moments worth watching. If you have 80 minutes why not High School Musical 3: Senior Year? You’re welcome.

|꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

Rating: Ho/HoHoHo

 

Chasing Christmas (2005, dir. Ron Oliver)

Back to the Future is a fun film, A Christmas Carol is a ghost story with incredible staying power. Both are touching, engaging, imbued with adventure. Ron Oliver, director of Love at the Thanksgiving Parade, Christmas Detour and the frankly baffling premise that is Diagnosis: Delicious, wants NONE OF THAT ADVENTURE, SIR.

Continue reading “Chasing Christmas (2005, dir. Ron Oliver)” |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리 → |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

Guest Post: Elf Bowling the Movie: The Great North Pole Elf Strike (2017, dir. Dave Kim & Rex Piano)

Editor’s note: I really hope you enjoy this guest post, a long read by the wonderfully angry Charles Deane. If you aren’t familiar with the Deane storytelling method, buckle in!

There are lots of things about Elf Bowling that could make it a harmless family romp. The cast includes Tom Kenny, the voice of Spongebob Squarepants, and Joe Alaskey, who has voiced many of the Looney Tunes classic characters like Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck since 2003. How bad could it be? |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

Continue reading “Guest Post: Elf Bowling the Movie: The Great North Pole Elf Strike (2017, dir. Dave Kim & Rex Piano)” |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리 → |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

A Star Crossed Christmas/The Spruces and The Pines (2017, dir. John Stimpson)

I love the desperation behind a double-titled film: either way you butter it, this film is gonna be no good. It’s Romeo and Juliet with tree farms. Even Marvista doesn’t believe in the premise, check out the afterthought of a font they use.

Continue reading “A Star Crossed Christmas/The Spruces and The Pines (2017, dir. John Stimpson)” |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리 → |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

A Heavenly Christmas (2016, dir. Paul Shapiro)

Hallmark have gone all out here. The budget for Kristin Favies, Shirley MacLaine, Will from Will and Grace and here’s the real coup, the rights to use an actual well-known Christmas song?? Settle in lads, this crap will have a real decent production value!

Except on Photoshop, Hallmark will forever be the paint.net station.

Continue reading “A Heavenly Christmas (2016, dir. Paul Shapiro)” |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리 → |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

My Christmas Prince (2017, dir. Sam Irvin)

PALS, how often does this happen: you’re dating a posh sounding guy you probably met at the UN, because this is New York. He needs to go abroad occasionally and he’s always followed by bodyguards but that’s just boyfriends, right? WRONG! He’s a European prince.

Continue reading “My Christmas Prince (2017, dir. Sam Irvin)” |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리 → |꽁머니 사이트|배트맨토토|네임드사다리

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